2023 NFL Mock Draft: Movie Star Edition
Movie Star Mock Draft NFL 2023
1. Chicago Bears – Bobby Boucher Jr. (South Central Louisiana State LB) The Waterboy
Bobby Boucher is the best prospect in this draft class hands down. Although he doesn’t have the highest football IQ, he stands out when you watch his film. In his first ever college football game, he recorded 7 tackles, 1 QB pressure that led to an interception and an interception. Therefore, Boucher would be the perfect fit for the Bears’ defense because he can play anywhere in the box. Although he primarily lined up as a 4-3 LB in college, he could make the easy transition to EDGE. This is because he can easily shed blocks to stop the pass and stuff the run. In conclusion, what more could you want from a defender?
2. Houston Texans – Willie Beamen (Houston QB) Any Given Sunday
Willie Beamen is arguably the most physically gifted QB in this draft class. He is very similar to Lamar Jackson because he can easily escape pressure. Beamen also has a strong arm that allows him to hit his target in stride deep down the field. However, I do have concerns about being able to perform under pressure. But after getting some experience under his belt, it won’t be a problem going forward.
3. Arizona Cardinals – Vontae Mack (Ohio State EDGE) Draft Day
With J.J. Watt retired, there is one position the Cardinals need to address and that is the defensive line. Vontae Mack is an absolute workhorse who plays with a very high motor. He has amazing body control to bend the edge and effortlessly get to the QB. Going forward, Mack can be the heart of the defense and a key to their success.
4. Indianapolis Colts – Paul Crewe (New Mexico State Penitentiary QB) The Longest Yard
Behind the Texans, the Indianapolis Colts need a QB the most. Paul Crewe is a natural leader whenever he gets on the field. He was able to transform a team full of prisoners to beat a semi-pro football team of prison guards. Although he has a past of throwing games, I don’t see that as a problem going forward. Since that is behind him, I think he can make the Colts even more dangerous.
5. Seattle Seahawks – Switowski (New Mexico State Penitentiary DT) The Longest Yard
This may be a little bit of a reach with this pick. But Carroll said himself that he lost sleep over how bad his defense was this season. Given this is a very thin defensive line class, the Seahawks need to reach on a player with natural talent. Switowski is a very physical talent that has enough power to pancake any offensive lineman. The biggest reason why he isn’t a consensus top 5 pick is because of his technique is… different. But, after getting coached up by Pete Carroll, Switowski will be a future pro bowler.
6. Detroit Lions – Stefan Djordjevic (Ampipe High School CB) All The Right Moves
The Detroit Lions are in perfect position to get the only defensive back with a first round grade. Djordjevic would be the perfect corner to line up next to Jeff Okudah. He is very natural in coverage and seems to make “All the Right Moves”. In addition, Djordjevic is very ambitious and will give it all in the secondary. The only concern that I have about his game is that he has a slight attitude problem.
7. Las Vegas Raiders – Shane Falco (Ohio State QB) The Replacements
With Derek Carr out the door, it is time to look for a long term answer at QB. This left-handed QB has all of the tools that you want from an NFL caliber player. He is confident in his receivers to make a play on the ball. In addition, Falco shows incredible poise in the pocket and rarely crumbles under pressure. This allows him to air the ball out down the field for a big gain. In conclusion, with all of the weapons he will have at his disposal, I have no doubt the Raiders could be contending for a playoff spot next season.
8. Atlanta Falcons – Rod Tidwell (Arizona State WR) Jerry Maguire
With Ridder looking like he is the guy going forward at QB, why not give him another weapon? The Falcons already have Drake London who can act as a deep threat. Given that Tidwell is a smaller receiver, standing at only 5’11”, he will likely play in the slot. But, he has shown that he can line up on the outside which would open up the middle for Kyle Pitts. Before making this pick, the Falcons need to understand that they will have to show him the money when his contract is up.
9. Carolina Panthers – Bo Callahan (Wisconsin QB) Draft Day
The Carolina Panthers are in the perfect position to get a franchise QB in this deep draft class. When you watch Callahan’s film, it is almost impossible to find a weakness in his game. There are some concerns surrounding how good of a teammate he is in the locker room. But, the Panthers need to draft a guy that can improve that offense. The natural talent is there and that cannot be coached. However, his attitude can be coached especially under Frank Reich.
10. Philadelphia Eagles – Phillip Finch (Central High School DL) Wildcats
Phillip Finch is the perfect fit for the Philadelphia Eagles. He is a very big nose tackle that reminds me of Packers legend Gilbert Brown. Given his incredible size, Finch is explosive off the snap and can easily get in the backfield. This translates into field goal defense as well. He has shown incredible explosiveness to get in the backfield and amazing athleticism to rise up and block field goals. In addition, pairing him up with Jordan Davis will be very dangerous going forward.
11. Tennessee Titans – Deacon Moss (New Mexico State Penitentiary WR) The Longest Yard
Although the Tennessee Titans selected Treylon Burks in the first round last year, Moss is impossible to pass at eleven. Moss is a natural athlete who is very productive on a football field. In addition, his strong hands allow him to make catches all around the field. When watching his film, he reminds me a lot of prime Michael Irvin.
12. Houston Texans – Battle X (New Mexico State Penitentiary DE) The Longest Yard
After adding Willie Beamen with the 2nd overall pick, it would be a good idea to address the defense with this pick. Battle was a star on the defensive line for the Mean Machines because he packs a punch with every tackle and can even appear on special teams. When making a tackle, he hits so hard, it looks like he has brass knuckles on his hand. Therefore, I would not be shocked if he has a similar career what J.J. Watt had in Houston.
13. New York Jets – Billy Bob (West Canaan High School Guard) Varsity Blues
The New York Jets have some problems to resolve on the offensive side of the ball. In the last play of the final game of the season, Jonathon Moxon’s pass was tipped. Billy Bob caught the tipped pass and ran the ball into the endzone. Additionally, he is an incredible pass-blocker who can buy his QB time in the pocket. Bob would be the missing piece of the Jets’ offensive line and could even help some of their scoring problems.
14. New England Patriots – Buddy (Fernfield High School WR) Airbud The Golden Receiver
Do I really need to explain this pick? Bill Belichick is one of the best coaches to ever step foot on a football field, because he has proven that he can develop late-round picks into Hall of Famers. Therefore, I can’t imagine how special New England’s offense would be with this golden receiver.
15. Green Bay Packers – Thad Castle (Blue Mountain State LB) Blue Mountain State
Thad is a natural inside linebacker who can do it all. He is very athletic and can make a play on the ball carrier anywhere on the field. Although the Packers have two good linebackers already, by taking Thad here they could transition to a 4-3 defense. By doing so, the Packers would have Campbell, Walker, and Castle holding down the middle of the field. Personally, I can’t name a better linebacker trio than these three. The only concern that I have about Thad is that he does not have the football IQ most linebackers have. However, it is hard to argue with his natural talent.
16. Washington Commanders – Ronnie Bass (T.C. Williams QB) Remember The Titans
Since Carson Wentz did not work out last season, the Commanders are in search of a new QB. Therefore, who better than T.C. Williams’ own Ronnie Bass? He can quickly move the ball down the field with his insane accuracy and poise.
17. Pittsburgh Steelers – Louie Lastik (T.C. Williams OL) Remember The Titans
Now that the Steelers have their franchise QB and RB, they need to protect them. Lastik is a big offensive lineman who can easily overpower defenders and open up run lanes. Lastik is also a great locker room guy who can keep morale high throughout the season.
18. Detroit Lions – Jonathon Moxon (West Canaan High School QB) Varsity Blues
Although the Detroit Lions have another season with Jared Goff under contract, they should plan for the future. Moxon is a very smart and instinctual QB, who is very good in a no-huddle offense. When he is given time in the pocket, he is very good at hitting his receivers in stride.
19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Rico Dynamite (Preston High School QB) Napoleon Dynamite
With Tom Brady retired, I could not think of a better replacement than Rico Dynamite. This guy is constantly out in a field recording himself so he can improve his game. There is also a note of him mentioning that he could still throw a football over a mountain. Additionally, when you watch his film, he shows that he can hit his receivers in stride.
20. Seattle Seahawks – Julius Campbell (T.C. Williams EDGE) Remember The Titans
Julius Campbell would be an incredible addition to the Seahawks’ defensive line, because he is explosive and plays with a very high motor. Campbell can line up on the line and in the box. Regardless of where he lines up, you can be sure he is going to play with soul power.
21. Los Angeles Chargers – Ray Jennings (Florida State RB) Draft Day
Although Jennings would not be playing ball for his dad’s former team, he will have a tremendous career for the Chargers. Jennings is a very elusive back that has amazing downhill speed. Plus, pairing him up with Ekeler in the backfield would be very scary for the AFC West.
22. Baltimore Ravens – Joe Kingman (Boston Rebels QB) The Game Plan
With Lamar Jackson likely leaving town, the Ravens may as well add a QB of similar play style. Kingman is very mobile and can perform when it matters most. Although he has been selfish for the majority of his career, now that he is a family man, he will be able to take his game to new heights. Throughout his past season with the Rebels, he improved upon his vision and his ability to distribute the ball. But don’t worry, he can still extend plays with his legs and take the ball into the endzone himself.
23. Minnesota Vikings – Alex Moran (Blue Mountain State QB) Blue Mountain State
Alex Moran is a natural pocket passer who can perform on any stage. Whether it is a bowl game or a corn field, Moran can produce if he has good play calling. Although he can get a little distracted off the field, it is hard to argue what he can do on the field. As a result, I would be very excited to see what Moran can do with Cook, Jefferson, Hockenson on his side.
24. Jacksonville Jaguars – Earl Megget (New Mexico State Penitentiary RB) The Longest Yard
Since the Jaguars traded James Robinson to the Jets, it would be a good idea to add another running back to the roster. Earl Megget is very light on his feet which allows him to quickly reach his top speed. Additionally, he is also difficult to bring down in open field and would be dangerous on special teams.
25. New York Giants – Forrest Gump (Alabama Athlete) Forrest Gump
With all of the big name wide receivers off the board, the Giants go with the next best thing. Forrest Gump is one of the most interesting prospects in this draft. He did not play a single snap of football before walking on at the University of Alabama. Gump may not be the most elusive player in the draft, but he is impossible to bring down in open field.
26. Dallas Cowboys – Lucy Draper (Texas State Kicker) Necessary Roughness
The biggest concern that the Cowboys need to address this offseason is their special teams. In the playoffs, Brett Maher missed 4 extra point attempts against the Buccaneers. After that, he also looked inaccurate on some field goal attempts. Although it is almost unheard of to take a kicker this early, Lucy Draper can fix the Cowboys’ kicking problems.
27. Buffalo Bills – Darnell Jefferson (Eastern State RB) The Program
The Buffalo Bills’ offense was very solid last season. However, the one thing they lacked was a running back with big play potential. Jefferson is very slippery when he gets the ball in his hands and is impossible to stop in open space. Regardless of the combination of backs the Bills decide to keep, their backfield will be very dangerous. The only concern I have about Jefferson’s game is his ball security. But after a season of NFL caliber coaching, it should no longer be a problem.
28. Cincinnati Bengals – Smash Williams (Texas A&M RB) Friday Night Lights
The Cincinnati Bengals have one of the most complete rosters in the NFL. Since all the good offensive lineman are taken, the next weakest position this season was arguably running back. Smash Williams is a natural leader. Therefore, he would fit perfectly in Zac Taylor’s offense. He has tremendous speed that allows him to make big plays. Furthermore, Williams also has good hands so he can act as a safety valve for Burrow going forward.
29. New Orleans Saints – Vince Howard (East Dillon High School QB) Friday Night Lights
With Jameis Winston likely leaving the Saints, I think it would be smart to bring in a player of similar play style. Vince Howard is perfectly fit for today’s NFL because he has a strong arm to quickly move the ball down the field. Additionally, Howard is light on his feet and can make a play on his own if no one is open.
30. Philadelphia Eagles – Daniel “Rudy” Ruettiger (Notre Dame DE) Rudy
Nick Sirianni loves to draft players with a high work ethic. Daniel Ruettiger has the highest motor out of everyone in this draft class. Although there are concerns about his lack of size and experience, he is a great pick for the Eagles. Ruettiger played one college snap and recorded a sack. Imagine how many sacks he could record if he is given significant snaps.
31. Kansas City Chiefs – Cheeseburger Eddie (New Mexico State Penitentiary TE) The Longest Yard
Given this is a very thin defensive draft class, Andy Reid should draft the player that will help him out the most. Reid has transformed the tight end position in the NFL. Kelce would remain as the number one guy for Mahomes, but Eddie would be a solid 2nd option. Also, Reid is a huge cheeseburger fan and Eddie can supply him with as many cheeseburgers as he desires.
2023 NFL Movie Star Mock Draft Analyst – Matthew Lewis
